Before                                                 After

I felt like a ticking time bomb, full of anger and depression. Many times I wanted to kill myself because of the abuse I suffered as a child. At the age of 6, a really close family member of mine molested me. Due to this, I grew this violent hate inside of me against him. Because of the abuse I suffered, it cause me to grow up being promiscuous, always wanting to be with a boy; to love and give me the affection that I wanted, and thought I needed. I never found what I was looking for. The only results I've received throughout my search were many broken hearts, sleepless nights, crying, and insecurities. No matter what, I always felt lonely like I couldn't depend on anyone, even though I had the boy that I wanted and or tons of friends that were always there for me. I felt empty inside.

At the age of 14, my father was sent to prison. Due to this, I felt very lonely and depressed. Depressed to the point that I attempted to commit suicide 3 times. The first time was over a bad relationship and I tried to overdose myself with pills. The second time I tried to kill myself, I tried cutting my wrist and bleeding out to death. I still have the scars on my arm till this day. I was feeling overwhelmed by my problems, broken home, disastrous love life and I felt like there was no way out. I thought death could help me escape my problems so that's why I took a razor and started to cut myself... My final attempt at suicide was my second attempt at overdosing on pills. Somehow, no matter how much I wanted to die and tried to kill myself, I would always survive. Furthermore, I hated going to the church and I hated when my parents forced me to go. Sometimes I would just stay in the car or just outside the church doors.

When I had enough with my life and the way it was, I began to come to the YPG. Through coming to the YPG it has changed me and taught me even to love myself. I learned to forgive, to let go of the anger, the loneliness, the depression and helped me to find true happiness.

Today, I no longer hate my family member for what he has done to me, I love him dearly and we talk more than ever. I am no longer lonely and depressed. I am no longer suicidal and I found my one true love! His name is God and I love going to the church because I finally found TRUE happiness.

 

 

     

Before                       After

Before coming to the YPG, I was completely lost. At the age of 11, I started watching pornography and from that day on I became addicted to it. I would watch it almost every day, when no one was around, on the computer and even my cell phone. When going to school, I wanted to follow what all my friends were doing just to feel accepted by others. I got involved with boys and girls and mostly girls because I would think that boys were stupid and that getting involved with girls would be better for me. I used to be very tough and very aggressive with people around me.

I also started cursing a lot, going to different kinds of parties, drinking, and I would think that it was something normal and that everyone in my age group was doing it, so I thought why not join them. At the age of 15, I started dating and this time it was a serious relationship. At first my mom didn’t wanted me to date anyone because she felt that I was too young to date and that I should only focus on my studies and nothing else. I didn’t listen to what my mom said and I continued the relationship anyways. I forced my mom to accept the relationship.

I was so in love with the guy that everything he would ask me to do, or to give, I would find a way and give him what he wanted. One day he approach me and told me that his parents wanted him to go study in another country which was United States- Houston Texas were his oldest brother was also. ( I was living in Angola at the time) I was so in “love” with him I convinced them to let me go with him to study and live in the country, my mom again didn’t wanted me to go, but I persuaded her to change her mind and she accepted and gave me the permission to go.

As Soon as we got in the plane to come to Houston I thought that everything would be perfect, that he would be always with me and never leave me or treat me bad, but I was wrong. As soon as we got to the country he started treating me differently and we started having a lot of arguments and problems.

We were living together as if we were married. Eventually, he started to abuse me emotionally. He would text other girls, go out to parties and with friends, drink a lot, come home drunk and I would just stay at home. He mistreated me, called me all type of names and there were times he physically abused me, and I would just cry and ask myself why all these things were happening to me.

Since I was going to a school in Houston I met a girl that was also from my country. She invited me to come to the Youth Group, which at first I was surprised because I didn’t know that the Youth Group was also in Houston. When I was in my country I never liked this church I would think that everything they did was a lie and that all they wanted steal people’s money. This friend she would keep inviting me over and over and since I was having so many problems and feeling so sad, one day I decided to go to the church and it was in December in a New Year Eve. When I enter the church I saw the pastor, the assistants, everything was so different and I liked. They were all so happy and smiling and from that day on I started coming more to church.

At first my boyfriend didn’t like the idea but he would let me go anyways. But I would go to church and still lying, cursing, drinking, watching pornography, giving a bad testimony, and living a life of prostitution. One day in the service pastor spoke about pornography that it wasn’t from God and from that day on I just stopped watching it. Also, I heard that living in prostitution doesn’t please God and so I decided to stop doing it, because I didn’t wanted to displease God. From this day on my boyfriend started to hate the church and telling me that was going to church to stay with other men, he would impede me to go to church but these friend of mine that invited me to church was worried about me and I told her everything that was going on and she helped me. I made a decision to end the relationship with the guy that I was dating, because I didn’t wanted that life anymore I wanted to change, and get serious with God, so I went to live with my friend and started going more to church, evangelizing, and helping more day by day. I got baptized in water 2 times. The first time was in a YPG vigil, but the baptism didn’t work because I went back to my old ways. The second time I was serious about it and I decided to change and give my life to God completely and don’t go back to my old ways.

Today I can say that I am a completely different woman. I don’t drink anymore, I am not addicted to pornography, I don’t have desire to stay with girls anymore and I don’t live in prostitution. I no longer need to try to show off to friends; today I am who I AM. Today I am clean, transformed, and I gave my whole life to God, my youth, my body, the way the devil used me before to do bad things, today I want to do even more in the presence of God to give a pay back to the devil by bringing as much people as possible to God’s presence

Before                              After

Before coming to church I suffered with depression, suicidal thoughts, insomnia, and much more. I grew up basically on my own. Although I lived with my mom I felt as if she wasn't really there for me.  By the third grade I was already stealing, working, and addicted to cigarettes. By 8 I had tried to commit suicide by standing in front of a oncoming train because I couldn’t take the suffering any more. A few seconds before the train came some thing inside me just wouldn't let stay standing. After a while I was taken away from my mother and sent to live with my dad. It was there that I came to know the church. I was in the church for about 5 years before I started to actually change.

Before then I was just I a wolf dressed in sheep’s clothing. At school, I was the big man, the bully, always getting into fights. I almost fought my cousin one day and I would fight his friends to show them that I wasn't weak. But at church I was like a innocent person. Many people of the church were shocked when some one would say that I done something wrong. Getting to high school everything started to change. I started to fight for myself to change. It was when a pastor spoke to me. He told me that if I really wanted to be used by God, I need to start to change. He then told me, that he would give me one month to change. Although at the moment I was filled with anger inside of me, only after I realized that he was right. Little by little I started to separate from the bad influence. I became more involved in the church then I already was. A few months later I was lifted as an assistant.

Furthermore, I became a student pastor. In September I was called to be an auxiliary pastor for the Spanish church but then sent back home because of my age. Although I was discouraged for a while, I remembered about a Campaign of Israel my father did for me before I came to live with him. He said that if God gave me to my dad, he would return me to God, as to serve God on the Altar. And this promise is what kept me moving forward. When I was younger I would participate in Campaigns but it was never my all. But one Campaign I told myself that I couldn't accept to be the same after the campaign and that is what happened. After this Campaign my way of thinking, way of seeing things, and much more. Today I am serving God in the Altar. I am free from depression suicidal thoughts, insomnia and everything

 

I had grown up in the church, going to CBC (bible school) in the church up until I was 10 years old. I had stopped little by little going to church as much because it was only a Spanish church and I only understood English. And also the bible school only went up to the age 10 years so they wouldn’t allow me inside the Bible school anymore because I was too big. There was a point I completely stopped going to church because the world seemed more interesting than church.

By the 6th grade kids in my school already had boyfriends and I wanted to fit in, so I also followed their ways and did what they did. I always felt like the outcast in school so I pushed even harder to fit in. In this process depression started to increase and always felt useless. So having many relationships was a habit for me. I would use all those relationships to make me feel better for just a little while but then later it would fade away. Then I started to give problems at home by the

7th grade disobeying my parents and staying after school just so I wouldn’t face problems at home. I would tell lies to my mom a lot saying I was at school or practice but I was really at a friend’s house or with boys. I disliked my family a lot especially my brother I would want to get revenge on him to the point that once I got so mad I wanted to kill him. Broken relationships and bad temper was a curse in my family and everyone seemed to have this in my family.

I was in a particular relationship for 2 years and he was the center of my world for a long time. I made him my “god”. Till one day it all ended. I was torn apart and that was when I realized I was so empty. So I prayed with all my strength asking God to help me and take away this emptiness. My mom always would push me to go to church with her but I always got mad and told her no. But this time she asked me to go with her for a mother’s day gift and I agreed, without knowing that she had sacrificed in a campaign for me in the church.

That day I was invited to the YPG and that day my life began to change. I decided to give my life to God and put His word into practice daily. I started to put into practice what I was taught in YPG and today I am happy and no longer am empty. I no longer am in many relationships to make me feel happier, now I know true happiness. My relationship with my parents is great and my brother and I get along now.  I am full of God’s presence and am serving Him as an assistant in the church. Now I know where I’m going.

 

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