Few people get married thinking about betraying their partner, of course, there are those with bad character, that usually already betray even before marriage. For most part, couples are committed to faithfulness, at least early on in the relationship. Until they reach the difficult stages, when the honeymoon is over and the new things are no longer news, and when the attention and affection are no longer exclusive and become things of the past.

There’s a lot of work, bills to be payed, she no longer has time for him because she has to study, work, take care of the house, which leads to frustration because he usually doesn’t help her with those things. Then come the children, who take up the little bit of time the couple has at the end of the day. She no longer takes care of herself for him, he doesn’t listen to her, the bills get piling up, relatives are intruding, the video game becomes an escape for him and for her, an enemy at home.

That’s it, the stage for a future betrayal is set. Now we just need a third person.

Pay attention to the following pitfalls that many who have betrayed their spouses fell into without realizing it, until it was too late:

  • Looks that intrigue you but don’t constrain. This is one of the first signs of someone who is interested in you. This person looks at you  frequently, they seem to admire you from afar, look at all your steps, they pay attention to you out of all the other people around you. That may be constraining at first, but then it begins to intrigue you. You are calling the attention of the opposite sex, something that does not happen any more in your marriage, so you at least feel flattered.
  • Compliments about your appearance and performance. After staring, comes the “open-path-praises”. The person is able to see what your partner doesn’t see or perhaps doesn’t even notice anymore. Your new haircut, contagious smile, the new blouse, the way you talk, how good you are at what you do, etc. And it makes you feel special, admired and loved again… it’s been a while that you don’t feel this way, by the way, at home you feel completely the opposite…
  • Small conversations to be around you. Then, you start talking much more than before, it was only at work or on the street, now it’s after work, at the end of the day, on weekends and because it always makes you feel good, you do not see “anything wrong with that,” but, at the same time, you keep those conversations a secret, after all, you don’t want anyone to get the “wrong” idea about you two. But… deep down, you can’t stop thinking about this person, the next time you’re going to see each other, it’s as if you had married that person instead of your partner, who is “clueless” at your side.
  • Many things in common. The more you think about the possibility of you two being born for each other, the more the idea makes sense. You have so much in common that it is hard not to think that this person would be “right” for you more than your spouse. And you begin to question, “is it not with him that I’ll be happy?”.
  • Treated differently from everyone else. Whenever you see each other, the way he treats you, the kindness and friendliness of him simply enchants you. He is kind, thoughtful, always sympathetic with you, a true gentleman and he is not like that with everyone, just with you, which makes you feel the most beautiful woman in the world. And that’s when you start comparing him with your harsh husband and your frustration only increases between you. Of course, you begin to despise your spouse, get tired of him, and don’t bother getting his attention.
  • Likes everything you post and from time to time, not to make it so obvious, leaves a comment. Now you post everything thinking of him and he, as a good follower, likes everything that you post. He is discreet, but sometimes shows what he feels for you and his words leave you thinking for days and weeks. You want to decrypt everything he said, how he said it and why he said it… and when you come to the conclusion that it is a fact, he’s in love with you, you’ve already been passionate about him long ago.
  • Talks about you to your friends so that they can tell you. And to prove everything you feel, your friends start telling you the same, how he only speaks about you, how he looks differently at you, how he made a comment about you. Deep down, he did it because he wanted it to come to your ears, but you do not care for the obvious. It’s him, he’s the man you sought for all this time. How would it be to kiss him? How would it be to spend a night by his side?

Voila, you’ve cheated on your spouse and don’t know it. The day that you sleep together or at least kiss is just the tip of the iceberg.

Friend, know that this is all an illusion and if you do not stop it in time, you will regret what you did for the rest of your life. While you look at the man who is not your husband, you stop taking care of him, you stop looking at him, seeing his qualities and making him happy — how do you want to receive from him what you don’t give?

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